# The Source

It is only in darkness that we see the stars

"The Source."

It happened again. Another recurrence. I blinked around, awake now that I had actually spoken my half-lucid thought aloud.

"Hey Google, what time is it?"

"It is 1:31 AM."

I felt a little hungry so I got up to make a light bowl of some of the left-over taco salad I had with my family for dinner. But that wasn't the reason I was up. I wasn't energized to get up out of bed for physical sustainance. No. It was because of another idea I felt I needed to write down.

Still orienting myself in reality from deep slumber, I tried to recall the exact thought process that had sparked my utterance. Why had I said that in my sleep?

It was definitely a reference to source code. What was my source code? Like lightning, I had been struck with my source of true inspiration:

The Tarot.

But not just any tarot. The True Black Tarot (opens new window).

If I were to be operated by a guiding set of principles-- indeed, a source code, it would be that of the tarot. Comparable to a finite state machine (opens new window), the tarot reflects a process of recurring patterns found in nature. The hero's journey (opens new window) from the The Fool to enlightenment.

The Hero's Journey

I've always had a deep passion for reading. I read many books as a kid, especially adventure books. One of my favorites was Pendragon (opens new window). As a journalist, I strongly identified with the main character. In fact, I've always considered myself the hero of my own story, so much so that I would often have vivid dreams of action sequences; slaying a towering stone giant as lava erupted around us, harnessing deep powers of the mind to levitate and perform telekinesis, etc.

Perhaps that is why I was attracted to programming in high school. Reading source code came easy to me. I wanted to be a game programmer because I could always "see" the source code in games I played-- the mechanics that goverend the physics of the virtual world. I remember doing exceptionally well in high school when I was introduced to DarkBASIC (opens new window) in my first programming class, where creating a cube was as simple as:

make object cube 1,10
color object 1,rgb(255,0,0)

Like magic, a cube appears. It's no coincidence that I got The Magician from this tarot deck tattooed on my forearm.

If I am complex system operating on pure inspiration, then my source code would be The True Black Tarot. This was the thought that had inspired me to say "The Source" in my half-lucid state, not fully awake but not dreaming.

As I began to write, I drew a single card from my tarot deck to reflect upon.

The 3 of wands.

Opening up the guidebook that accompanied it, this is what I read.

EXPLORING TRAVEL

LEADING ADVENTURE

Where the Two of Wands represented a conflict between two choices: leaving or staying, the familiar or the new, the Three of Wands is already dead-set on embarking on a new adventure. In this card, the adventurer, is not only going somewhere new, but they are also taking their followers along.

The Three of Wands is a card of leadership, finding new horizons, and forging the way for others. A marine bird is shown diving headfirst into the waves as others follow suit. From a great height, it was able to gain perspective and establish a strategic, forward-thinking view of the situation.

Now, it is able to execute on a well-informed and planned strategy. With this card comes the optimism and excitement of success.

How fitting, considering I just started my new blog and my New Year's Resolution to develop a working prototype of my game, Space Pirates.

Tags: Reflections The Tarot The Source Inspiration
Last Updated: 6/1/2021, 8:55:34 PM